Wednesday, March 30, 2005
wednesday mornings
10:54am
the allure of you is more than i can take
kenny to God:
"thankyou"
the morning breeze without the strong sun
is nice, friends [nicole] buying nice books
is nice, my hardworking but insane PA is nice,
a cup of plain tap water is nice too.
and so is, learning to speak Russian when i cant.
working for BooksActually.com is very nice too.
for Mister God has already given it to me
so the more i must work hard for it.
and spending my time with her is Merveilleux
taking short-long walks home
standing between small swaying trees
and the silence that links us
holding your hands is all i ever need.
"for all the many stars that are un-explored
i will go with you, and only you."
darKness-ak
Sunday, March 27, 2005
Easter Sunday afternoons
1:30pm
Easter Morning service
i did not attend
but i still trust & seek consul with Mister God
in Parts & Parts , please
ten thousand & one books
the blueberry hill still connects
the Greenka Greenka shelves are still very Greenka
more works need to be done
still need to be more hardworking
as in generate higher quality work output
and i must always seek consul with Mister God
especially for the plans ahead for BooksActually.com
the Online Store will be released in its Beta Phase
hopefully, by the 1st April
and no, it won't be a sick April Fool's joke if we dont.
and of course, i must still upped & upped
the number of book titles that i have
cos' i do very much want to provide the best Selection for both you & me.
me, because i read like a bookfool (and not saying that you're one).
darKness-ak
Friday, March 25, 2005
Good Friday afternoons
2:32pm
when Mister God gives,
He truly gives.
thankyou, Mister God
randomness !!
four lines of colours that i coloured into my planner
waiting in olive green
standing in mandarin orange
rushing in sea green
stopping in grapefruit orange
her hair falls across my face
her scent is my comfort
windchime earrings resting on my shelves
vanilla tea resting with the milk
with her in my arms
and the metal toy train seems happy too
i forgotten the timing
terrapin is happy too
falling asleep
falling awake
a kiss on her head, and the night seems so much shorter already.
and i forgot to tell her "i love you" too.
darKness-ak
Wednesday, March 23, 2005
wednesday slightly-overcast mornings
9:18am
j du pre,
bach, cello suite no.1 in g, prelude
looped
God to kenny:
"do you believe in My intervention??"
updates
things are moving slightly along for BooksActually.com though albeit kinda of slow but this time round, it aint me slacking rather it is the way it is, it must be taken slow. as prayed & hoped, the Online Store in its Beta phase will be launched at the end of March. fingers crossed and lotsa of trust in Mister God. and at this point ive gotta give thanks for the many people that have helped so far. i'll not name names but you'd know who you are. in the meanwhile, just gotta work harder at every turn & every round. and for once, im very tempted to give up my Sunday, meaning no work at all, to Mister God. yes, i shall do no work at all other than talking to Mister God, and building my life with the few persons that matters most to me. after all, we have been told to reserve Sundays for Mister God, and i do want to spend a non-working day with my loved ones.
"the tea & cushions are our comfort,
and so is your smile & touch, mon cherie"
darKness-ak
Monday, March 21, 2005
monday real' mornings
11:14am
le petit cracker garçon
"we are like so damn Heroes
filled with regrets that we
can never wash away,
and can never make
peace with ourselves."
"what have we done?"
da Dood intervenes in His own ways
but only when i leave it up to Him
which i so often forget,
always pushing against the grain on my own
and asking for His help
but still pushing on my own
when i should have just let Him push
since i had already asked for His help.
i know He will keep on throwing difficult
things at me to make me learn & grow.
and i will not escape from it, i will not.
'and that she is lovely.
yesterday. sunday late afternoons. with her. swedish meatballs & roast beef. knick knacks of stuff that we need. cushions, boxes, frames, clothes hooks. movies of whale rider and jeux d'enfants. of one broken french question from me. to her teasing me from 'non' to 'oui'. and us growing sleepy but not wanting to sleep. small cup drinks of vanilla tea, with or without milk. and that we will keep our secrets secret. and that she knows of my deepest regret that i can never wash away. and im glad she understands bit by bit and some more. and she smiles. her smile is my chosen clarity. and God will keep me safe from my past. of wanting to plan a train holiday. and i promise you that we will do just that. and we should not forget about our picnics too. this is my desired happiness. for in my life, i do love you more.
darKness-ak
Friday, March 18, 2005
friday mornings
11:01am
its been a long time
______________coming,
and i wont look down
with you,
sleeping side by side on the blue slides
the few smallish stars smile a little bit
the hopskotch session
of one simple jump to another leap
the noisy swing swings
that brought out your smiles
the smile that is my clarity
like the cat that naps
like the naps we shared on a lovely morning-afternoon
i hear my heart beating
and wishing that you will dream of
Carousel dreams, as i slowly fall asleep
and did i ever told you,
holding your hands is like me walking in the rain
being the most wonderful thing
, that can ever happen to me
how can i say this otherwise,
really,
seriously,
but you're the gravity that makes me stay beside you
and i wont look down anymore
and i wont stare at the sun anymore
kenny
Wednesday, March 16, 2005
wednesday evening
7:01pm
when i close my eyes
when you smile clarity
standing at the window,
i cant un-do this God-given hynopsis
when you smile at me
thats where i found clarity
and it can also be a thousand pin pricks
to that machine heartling
for not being able to hold your hand
i cherish the spaces we share
but maybe something
is just not right in the air
i think im trapped in this afternoon
of having fallen,
for you
and even if you mightn't feel the same
i still want you to be happy
i had always wanted nothing to be different
whether it was set as a pair of chopsticks
or as individual as opposing bookends.
static always prevails
you are my clarity
and if i could be allowed to
"gradually,
everything will be still
the earth revolves around the sun
the sun revolves around us"
and in saying so
in my life, i love you more.
kenny
Tuesday, March 15, 2005
tuesday mornings
9:58am
God to kenny:
"hold on"
and i want to go see the world with her.
and this is what i wanted to say:
-----------moon river, wider than a mile
-----------i'm crossing you in style some day
-----------oh dream maker, you heart breaker
-----------wherever you're going i'm going your way
-----------two drifters off to see the world
-----------there's such a lot of world to see
-----------we're after the same rainbow's end
-----------waiting 'round the bend
-----------my huckleberry friend
-----------moon river and me
darKness-ak
Monday, March 14, 2005
monday late-noons
4:54pm
restless day
i wonder how will the
night be??
in all clarity of randomness
im not a perfect person
its not good enough
starcrossed, cant escape
the sleeps dont come
i lose my eats
body is breaking faster & slower
but im serious about her
i am serious about her
i can no longer save myself
i can only wait
its true
when they nod their heads
saying that "he has fallen deeply for you."
i will stare at the sun
for now.
reality as it usually should
breaks down again
darKness-ak
Saturday, March 12, 2005
saturday mornings
.at
long
last
i
am
back.
10:12am
God to kenny:
"dont forget Me"
for those who hadn't know yet, on the basis that i had kept it well-hidden on what the hell i have been up to, well, i have been selling books. or should i say i am finally admitting that i am in the biz of selling books, and is currently under the process of constructing the Online Store for www.booksactually.com. yes, the management at Borders Singapore is finally going to say, "Ah-arh, we knew it, we always knew that kenny was up to something like this." and yes dont bother trying the link now b/c all you'll get is Access Denied prompt. if everything goes well, the Online Store will be up by the last day of March.
concurrently, i had also just completed a mini book fair sale under the auspices of the NUS Arts Bazaar, and i can only say that the results & response by far, and more than far exceeded both my expectations and my fellow conspirators. i will be trying my darnest best to organise more mini book fairs at different locations in order to generate more cashflow for the biz. and i do need more cash to pay for so many things related to the biz. on the other hand, if anyone reading this is in knowledge that the place where you're working at is suitable for a mini book fair (a 2-table setup will suffice), well, do email me at kennysellsbooks@gmail.com. am sure we could work something out from there.
in the meanwhile, well, its time for all of you to start buying books from me b/c from a economical point of view, meaning the Singaporean point of view (both yours & mine) my books are far much lower in price. and of course, when you all start seeing the rampant profligation of the brand name booksactually.com, then you'd know not everything is my fault. just bear in mind that all marketing trickery cannot be blamed on just me alone, sometimes, and most of the times, beneficial branding exercise of the brand name booksactually.com is carried out without my prior knowledge or consent. from a legal point of view, as what my ah-beng style lawyer would say, myself & the biz & related parties cannot be held responsible both mentally, physically, financially, and morally for any actions that might ensue. and may da Dood bless this journey that we are undertaking with trepidation & self-doubts but in all manner, we will & shall trust & obey His "practical-joke" style guidance.
darKness-ak
Wednesday, March 02, 2005
Wednesday mornings
rainy, sunny, make up your mind
10:17am
got a straight hard knock on the head from da Dood yesterday. since my skull was too thick and my brain too dense to understand the situation at hand, da Dood decided to give it to me the hard way. and He has allowed me to emerged un-scathed. but i will always be a cracker, just a more charitable and God-driven kind.
* suddenly, i got this feeling that Bluehorn is lonely at home.
darKness-ak
Tuesday, March 01, 2005
tuesday Acidic mornings
10:28am
God to kenny:
"TSK TSK TSK"
as a slang, people who crack safes for a living were known as Crackers. and i think i fit aptly that description. thats it. back to what i do best albeit with a Charitable twist.
darKness-ak
